The Rabbi and The Shrink

Episode #9: Service?

May 06, 2021 Rabbi Yonason Goldson and Dr. Margarita Gurri, CSP Episode 9
The Rabbi and The Shrink
Episode #9: Service?
Show Notes

0:30 The sages taught that we are created for three purposes:

To learn, to serve, and to perform acts of kindness

We have to connect ourselves to something greater than ourselves, and that takes effort


3:00 Service has two elements: intention and effort; each can exist independent of the other but should be integrated

Good deeds have tangible and intangible benefits


8:00 Not all acts of value can be measured or quantified, yet they are substantive


10:00 It may be my job to serve, I may be getting paid, yet I am still providing service

How I do my job depends on my level of commitment, which may depend on the environment created by those around me


14:00  The value of service depends on effort, either in the moment or in preparation

We should always challenge ourselves to raise the level of our service


16:00 “The Love Languages”

Serving others depends on responding to their wants and needs


18:00 Why were Adam and Eve challenged by the prohibition not to eat?

There mission was to preserve the status quo, but they wanted to be active, not passive, contributors

EGO -- Elbow God Out


22:00 The status quo may be uninspiring but is essential to the foundation of our lives


26:00 Should parents pay children for chores and grades, or does that undermine the precept of service?

Make it fun

Reward vs. bribery: is there a difference?

Incentives for the entire family together to promote collective success: 

collective responsibility and rewards


34:00 Responsibility first, reward second

When we all do our jobs, we all benefit

It’s easier to do the job yourself than oversee and cajole children

Holding children responsible for doing jobs and teaching them to do them with joy give them a sense of self-worth, teaches them the value of work, and helps us appreciate one another


40:00 Providing the opportunity to serve teaches them the rewards of success

If it’s better to give than to receive, the greatest gift is the opportunity to give

“Mrs. Smith is doing very well in 4th grade.”

Anything worth doing is doing well


44:00 Is coerced work consistent with service?

The contradiction of “juvenile delinquent”

Levels of responsibility change as we grow and mature


46:30  Service is the key to a happy life

Accept apologies while asserting responsibility

Be gracious when being thanked

Use language with precision to promote a mindset of service


50:00 Love rebuke as an opportunity to improve


53:00 Word of the day: impeach -- to chain or trapped

Be become chained by the consequences of our actions and trapped by the habits we develop

Take risks, ask thoughtful questions, and be patient when others answer


56:00 Johnny Carson broke the rules of humor by drawing attention to his failures